Member-only story

It’s OK If You Don’t Like Kids

River Irons

--

Photo by Zachary Kadolph on Unsplash

This Atlantic article keeps appearing on my social media feed. The author insists that people shouldn’t say they don’t like kids because doing so objectifies them. Kids are people too.

Of course kids are people. Does anyone think they aren’t? The writer isn’t wrong, but they’ve oversimplified a complex topic.

The reasons people might say that they don’t like kids are deep and complicated. I know because I am one of those people.

I have kids who are now adults, and don’t get me wrong—I love them. But I know for certain that the person I am at the core of my being would never consciously choose to be a parent.

When people say they don’t like kids, they don’t necessarily mean they think young people are inferior or despicable. Whether we realize it or not, many of us who say we don’t like kids are actually rejecting the social pressures that society uses to push us into having kids: compulsory sexuality (the myth that everyone wants sex), compulsory coupling (everyone wants a permanent monogamous relationship), and compulsory heterosexuality (you know what it is). We’re rejecting what these things mean for our lives and who we are.

Even if someone does want sex and heterosexual monogamy, that still doesn’t mean that they want to or should become parents to fulfill that relationship. A…

--

--

River Irons
River Irons

Written by River Irons

I grew up in a White Supremacist cult. I escaped. I still search for freedom from oppressive constructs. Abolitionist. Queer. Digital Artist, Storyteller.

Responses (1)